I think I'm going to hire an outsourced administrative assistant.
Source: Yes, the source remains a mystery.
Explanation: In the book I'm reading, I discovered that there's a gentleman who created a company that will give you an Indian administrative assistant for $1500-$2000 a month. You may ask why on earth you'd want an administrative assistant in India instead of the United States, and I'll tell you why. India time is about a half day ahead of the United States. If you need a PowerPoint presentation created ASAP, you can make this request of your Indian administrative assistant as you leave for home in the evening. Your assistant is just starting his or her workday, and can spend the next 8 hours churning away on it while you eat dinner with your family, play with your kids, tuck them in and enjoy a nice quiet relaxing evening. When your assistant leaves for the day, he or she emails you your presentation and it's waiting for you first thing in the morning when you get in to work. Nobody has to put in any extra hours or anything! It's brilliant! I think I'm going to hire one.
Interesting Factoid: Outsourced telephone operators are taught that the letter T in American English is pronounced almost like a D, not nearly as crisp and sharp as the British pronounce it. To practice, they get to say exciting things like:
A bottle of bottled water held thirty little turtles. It didn't matter that each turtle had to rattle a metal ladle in order to get a little bit of noodles, a total turtle delicacy... The problem was that there were many turtle battles for less than oodles of noodles. Every time they thought about grappling with the haggler turtles their little turtle minds boggled and they only caught a little bit of noodles.
