The Entertainer

(if I had music on my blog, you'd SO be hearing: da da da da DAH di DAH di DAH, but I don't, so you aren't)

.

Something that probably doesn't need to be said: I am a very social being. Something else that doesn't need to be said: I love to cook (and share my cooking). The third thing that doesn't need to be said: I don't like to wait for something fun to happen.

.

All of these three, obvious-to-anyone-who-knows-me, statements mean that I LOVE to entertain. I am very comfortable having a group of people to my house and I love having control over what is eaten and what is done. We have people over for dinner, desserts, game nights or parties probably at least once a week.

.

That being said...I have a few hurdles that stand in the way of a good gathering for me.

.

Hurdle #1--my husband. Married to ANYONE else, as Ryan has noted, Ryan would seem like a very social guy. But because he is married to me, he has to take on the role of "Whoa, Jessica, I don't think we can fit that in this week." Which makes him seem like Mr. Anti-Social, which he's not. Once, while living in Utah, he was fed up and said, "That's it. I really cannot handle having anymore social gatherings at our house!" I pouted and knew he'd come around, eventually, when he saw how boring things were. He didn't. I finally had to come to him, teary-eyed, and tell him how much entertaining lifted me and that we had to find a compromise. We have. But I have to be careful and read between the lines with him.

.

Hurdle #2--my mother. She is the Queen of Beautiful Hostessing. I am not. I am the Queen of It Tastes Good But It's In The Stained Pan From Our Wedding Gifts or the Queen of Sure, Folding Chairs In The Living Room Look Fine. She has matching tablecloths, tons of pretty dishes and centerpieces and the energy to put it all together at the end. Sometimes the daughter-in-me has to fight the "this doesn't look pretty enough" thoughts in my head (as I did for my book club, see picture right with Nicole enjoying the fruits of my labor), because otherwise I'm afraid I'd entertain less often for fear of the stress it would create.

.

Hurdle #3--I overbuy, overcook and overplan. In a big way. For the aforementioned book club gathering, I truly had twice as much as I needed. (I served the leftovers to 3 families the next night.) Ryan has a much more accurate eye for how much we need, and I am learning to trust his figures, instead of mine. But. Is there anything more scary than the thought that the guest could want more food, AND I WOULDN'T HAVE ANY AVAILABLE???? (No.)

.

Hurdle #4--We live in an area where, between church friends and neighbor friends, there are easily (not joking) 20 couples/families I would love to invite to any given event. So the choice is: Invite a few and hope the others remember that they got invited before and don't get their feelings hurt OR don't ever do anything. You know what I choose, but I actually make a list of everyone I want to hang out with and rotate through, (lists, schedules, rules--aahh!) so I feel better.

.

What are your hurdles?

And P.S. Why am I having to put periods between every paragraph to get the spacing I want??!