This is it:
1) Buy a bunch of goldfish for 5 cents each.
2) Retail them (if you want) for 12 cents each. But this is NOT your big money-maker. Just wait.
3) Go to children's school carnivals and offer to give away FREE goldfish if little children can toss a ball into a floating pie tin.
4) Figure that exhausted, very pregnant mothers will never catch onto your scheme and will just be content that the kids are happily tossing.
5) Don't actually GIVE the fish to the children. Give them coupons to come to your store to redeem the little fishies.
6) Hope that the father-less, exhausted, pregnant mother will be thrilled for a fun Family Home Evening, in which she envisions happily Pet-Store-Occupied children enraptured for hours on end, while she rests on a bench.
7) Have a gung-ho, animal loving employee that can guilt the mom (the father would never fall for any of this) into getting
- a bigger fishbowl than she wanted ("They'll die in a few days, ma'am, if you buy that small one),
- water conditioner ("Spokane has a LOT of chlorine that could kill these sweet little fishies...")
- neon colored rocks
- fish food (sorry, you'll have to just settle for the cheapest fish food purchase...this mom is starting to wise-up)
8) Realize that you have given away .20 worth of actual goldfish and have sold a grand total of $18.73 worth of fish merchandise.
9) Bask in your riches and wisdom.
10) Enjoy pictures of children everywhere enjoying their new friends:
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